Some Other Time Then

Mountain RangeIt’s Friday, Nov. 10, 2017. I know you know that. The reason for my reference to the date, or more specifically, day of the week is that on Monday I was released from my new position as insurance sales agent. It all started in September.

I interviewed September 7th and was offered a position as insurance agent two days later. I was drawn to the company because of their training program. I was asked to come to the office for a morning meeting at least once a week. I suppose it was to re-insure them of my interest in the position. So, every Tuesday or Thursday I happily dressed the part and went to the meeting. I didn’t get paid for my time and I wasn’t official until I passed a 215 license state exam. I paid for the classes and the test. If I pass the state exam, the company will reimburse me.

On October 9th, I passed my state exam and was reimbursed the fees for my training and license. I went out into the field with an assigned mentor. I young woman, married with two small children. I spent at least eight hours a day with her, sometimes less. I didn’t make any money that week. The following week, I spent four days at the corporate headquarters.  We spent our time training on how to be an insurance sales person and telemarketing.

I would like to stay positive on this subject but quite frankly you need to know things were not always positive.

Sales, really!

I have never seen myself as a sales agent of any kind. I was never good at Avon, Mary Kay, or any of the other “home party” companies. I would rather people come to me to by my product. I didn’t want to go to them and sell them my product, or me. Because really, in sales, you are ultimately selling yourself first.

That being said, I was desperate for a job. I had been applying for jobs for what seems like forever. I remember my boss saying, “People go into sales as a last ditch effort to make money”.  Trust me, there is money to be made in sales, no matter who you work for. And, this, was my last ditch effort. I thought too, “if this doesn’t work out I’ll go back into photography”. It didn’t work out. I was let go after two weeks back from agent training. No reason was given. No discussion was wanted. I don’t know what I did or said that made my boss want to part ways. I made goals for myself. I had plans. So, some other time then?

Break Time is Over.

I think I need a break – a break from my life. I’ll be 56 years old a week from today. I’m not happy about it. It is what it is, as they say. But seriously, there is just so much more to life than playing house or working a 9 to 5. I think I might work on my books and photography. Maybe I’ll do some travelling. I need – an adventure. I have to decide soon.

Being let go from my job was devastating. I take it very hard and find it difficult to just pop back into society, or everyday life. Yes, I cried. I got angry. Even my husband got angry at my boss.

I Get To Choose My Life.

I was listening to a podcast recently and the woman said, “Everyone has a plan for my life and how it should look, [from my kids, husband, boss, family, friends]. But, I am the one who gets to choose my life”. I love that statement. She’s right. I need to tell everyone around me, “I get to choose my life. Just because you want to sit around here not experiencing life, doesn’t mean I have to”.

I feel like I am wasting away here. There is so much more outside of me to experience and I want to do that before I leave this planet.

There’s just one problem. I don’t like doing things by myself. It’s also not safe to go travelling by yourself. You don’t know how many times I have wanted to get into my car and just take off up north. I think I can go as far as half way on my gas gauge. You know, like if there’s a half a tank, I’ll just drive for as far as a quarter tank will take me. Then, I’ll have enough gas to turn around and come back home.

I know my blogs are always short, but I am determined to make them better. I will be doing some updates to the look and theme of my blog. I will be adding new photos and links. Stay tuned!

Always,

PM

 

 

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Waking Up

November 8, 2016 4:07 AM

 

So many times I wake up in the middle of the night and I think I should probably get up and go to some writing. And so here we are.

My husband and I had another fight last night. But before it could escalate into a screaming match I walked out and came into my office. It seems here lately that I can’t say anything to him without him thinking I’m trying to start a fight. Think it’s his defense mechanism because he doesn’t want any confrontation so he puts all the blame on me. I’m not trying to give him excuses but this really is getting old. I don’t know how much longer I can hold on.

Putting all the blame on him but whenever I try to discuss things that have to do with the house he thinks I’m nitpicking or trying to start an argument. I don’t know anybody wants to start an argument just for arguments sake. And if there are people out like that out there, find something else to do your sanity is not even worth it.

I’ve been wanting to write some books so took some time off from school. I’m not even sure I’m going to go back. I can’t finish my degree anyhow. I have capped out of my financial aid. I have some ideas on how I can maneuver getting everything paid for finished but all that stuff takes time. I just don’t have time. I keep picking up other things you side jobs and side projects just extra stuff that I really don’t need to be picking up.

I have one that I want to write about and that is my relationship with my mom. Another book I have which is fiction, is about a woman who is very wealthy and powerful in the community, leave the secret life in her mansion. The plot is she has these relationships with men and they all seem to move into her mansion. Each one has a specific role to play. There is also a book about the adventures with my dog. But apparently someone has already come up with a children’s book with the adventures of her dog. It seems like every good idea I have someone else is already picked it up. That happens to me with inventions as well. I don’t ever have the money to spend on an invention so therefore I can’t do anything about it and that gives someone else plenty of time to come up with the same idea

I am trying out my new software with you right now. I bought a digital download of Nuance Dragon naturally speaking. I can tell I will need to go back and edit this article. I’m hoping to use this technology to. That’s why I bought it. Duh!

The only issue I’m having is that my headset is so large and the earpieces go over my ears, for listening quality, but it’s annoying I really just want a headpiece that just has a microphone on it. Off to Amazon.com I go.

See you later.

P

Oh P.S.  Should I give you a lesson to learn here? Some MAJOR quote? Should my writing be about what you take away from it or about what I am sharing about myself in the moment? Just curious!